The cold war continues

As mentioned in my previous entry, the cold war between the other side and mine continues with my energizer not calling me and my sister only speaking in terms of work.... But you know something??? I really do not care what they think. The very fact that they do not think that what they did was wrong and are not repentant is something I feel very personally insulted about.

It is not that I do not love energizer, but we cannot spoil her and let her feel like she is the prima donna and especially after what she did, which was in the first place a really silly thing. My monster does stupid things and sometimes it ends with falls and so on... I do not rush to her aid as I will and may not be able to rush to her aid in time. She has to learn how to fall and pick herself up.

And in fact nowadays, she tries to do silly things like standing on the bed and jumping and so on. She even tries to climb onto the chairs and be spiderwoman.... Fall and go splat lor.... Learn that it is dangerous lor... If not, do you think she will ever learn? I can tell her fire is hot and it will burn, but if she don listen and gets burnt... we just have her cry and explain to her that "we told her so".....

I am getting old and we cannot promise to be there when she get older. Even my wife has no guarantees that she will live to see monster grow old. I am even worse.... So we gotta train her to look after herself and for her to be able to support herself and be strong mentally.

Anyway, you know, the energizer just loves going to the doctors to see if there is anything wrong with her. But at her age and even at my age, the more you go to doctors, the more problems they will find. I went to the doctor about my usual prostate probem, and ended up with a fear that there might be cancer at the prostate and also a diagnosis that I have Type 2 diabetes.... Most people will curse and swear and feel that they are so poor thing.... I only went "knn.... why the holy f**k did I bother".... I do not want to be called poor thing and it defeats the purpose to moan and groan... Just find a way to solve whatever problems you have lor. Other people and everyone else has their own problem.... How much more do you think they will be able to bothered by yours? That is why I really love the Japanese movie Departures.... It makes death looks so honorable and in a way beautiful.... I am not afraid of it and like I mentioned so many times before.... I will even asked my old fren death, "What took you so long to come for me... my friend"

A very depressed person

This is the picture of the scratch on my monster's back after my energizer tried to run her down. It was a long and uglier scar on the first day. I really just do not understand how my sis and energizer can be more worried about the old and not those who are still young and living. It is like energizer's use of money. She is a black hole when it comes to money as it is never enough. If you give her $100, she will ask for a thousand and she will spend it all. I have no bloody idea where she is spending it as she never has anything remaining at the end of the month. Oh yea... do not expect or even hope to find a pot of gold lah.... She spends it all lah.

So now comes the most painful decision.... do I keep trying to maintain the old when my child is asked to forfeit her share or do I try to be diplomatic? Well diplomacy is really not an option because I have already had many clashes with the energizer many times and for many years and it will lead to no where. My wife is already becoming irritated (to put it mildly) that I have to pay for energizer's medical visits and also any operations and so on and also give her money whenever she needs it and she is also taking from my sister. And also she is losing her brains.... So what do I do? If no one wants to admit to the fact and I am the only person who is thinking for the future and the family's future, then I am finding it a very difficult task and the only thing I can do now is to just withdraw and to cut off all connections. If not, I will face another bankruptcy and another round of being poor just to make the energizer feel good and it will not be fair for my family.

And being around the energizer is now not safe for my child as she may be innocently trying to play and energizer may take it as something else and do something silly again. In the end, it will be another drama and my sis will then try to assuage her own psychological problems by trying to play up to the drama and it will just make energizer feel more like being the drama queen that she is... I am at a loss now.

Its just like the newspaper said

It is sad, but our elderly will have to die in foreign lands. This is because elderly care in Sg is becoming too expensive and also in some ways unmanageable. Take my energizer rabbit for example, she keeps wanting to see doctors and to have something wrong with her so that people can say "poor thing" to her and perhaps be a bit nicer to her. In the end, it willsad cost us a bomb.... My question is if something is wrong with her, then how? She has already had cancer and is having diabetes and high blood pressure. Her natural lifespan may be for a few years to tens of years. She already has Alzheimer's and her mental aspect is also going off. So do we pay to maintain a coconut husk? If not will the gahmen make noise or the coconut make noise?

It is really really sad. And what is sadder is that I have 2 people on the other side who are weak, egotistical and do not really have a clue what they are doing in their lives. On Sat, wat happened was that my monster was playing near a table, near my sister. My eyes were on her and I guess my sister's was too. My monster was bending down and suddenly my energizer rushed to push my monster away because she thought that monster wud hit her head. Energizer missteppes, fell and hit the front part of her head on the table and started a whole drama that lasted into the night. Claiming that she felt faint, wanting to die and so on. In the end, I did a preliminary check and she was ok. She went upstairs to her room and even said she was hungry. No one even bothered about my poor monster who was tangled up in a heap of legs and was really damn confused. My sister was panicked, wanting to send energizer to the hospital and so on. Come on, people hit their heads all the time. If you lost consciousness or started to vomit or if your pupils are not dilating properly, I would be worried, but if after the initial state of confusion, you seem ok, there is no need.

After I got home, I found that monster had a big scratch on her back and lucky she did not hit any table leg or chair and having 50kg's rushing on her may have broken bones and so on. If people bend down and were about to bang their heads, all you need to do is to advise them or alert them. Not rush at them like football tacklers and then fall into a heap with them. Well the other side's drama continued well into the night like I mentioned, with energizer now saying that she had a bad dream and so wanted to be brought to a hospital. My sister, being an idiot, did not bring her to a normal clinic, but decided to bring her to Mt E, A&E. The dr said that she was fine. (I am still fuming because this is the umpteenth time my medical decision has been countermanded by an idiot who does not know anything about medicine). Then the dr was a bit worried about energizer's blood pressure and wanted her to remain under observation. So she started to fume and ho and hum and made her blood pressure even higher. For goodness sake... she does not even take her medications religiously!!! In the end my silly tried all means to find some medical professional to see if there is anything wrong with her (energizer). Erm, the dr already said nothing was wrong. It is just that someone with dementia saw the wrong situation and reacted and had a fall... Then being guilty, and wanting attention, of course, it ended up in this way.... So now my friends.... I ask you.... WTHF..... and when they went home, old crazy had left her bag at the hospital.... Why do people not just understand the situation and just live with it?

I am now afraid of my mom because she has shown that she is incapable of lookign after my child and may even cause hurt rather than harm. And as her dementia continues, she will be more of a problem not only to all, but also herself. So I am really really stuck. She cannot control money, seems to be spending heaps for no rhyme of reason and yet is unable to see any reason. Is the gahmen going to help us? I doubt so.

Its getting more difficult to blog

Lately, after blogger has been incorporated into Google accounts, I have been having trouble getting in.... darn!!!

Anyways, latest on my rabbit is that she has just gone for an eye op to lift her skin over her eyelid higher instead of it drooping over her eyes.... But..... the thing is that it cost me 4k in Medisave and 700 in cash..... Worth it??? The jury is still out on this lah... She has had droopy eye for a long time already... Jus look at my pics... I have the same eyes!!! Anyways... money down the drain to make someone feel better... haizzzzz

But she has actually shown that her mental capacities are actually slipping because she told the nurse that the blood pressure machines the hospitals were using were not accurate.... yea right.... Which ones are more accurate???!!! Ossim???? Lives are dependant on those machines.... Just because it does not give a reading you are happy with, it is not accurate???

And then she was again asking if she could take her meds and so on, but when I looked at it, she was being selective because some were pretty full strips and some were pretty well taken..... Then when she went home, she had already forgotten how to take her meds and was applying the meds for her eyes the wrong way.... Pretty soon, she will be eating shit and rubbish and getting lost if we are not careful.... But then of course, my darling sister will say that she will look after my mom and so on and in the end leave it to someone else to pick up the shit.

Life is funny, but in the end, all you can do is laugh.....