Lighter News

YOu know, in a world of gloom and doom, it is important to try to find the lighter side of things so that we can cheer ourselves up and to have something to look forward to in life. And I do not mean irrational things here hor.

My only happiness is news of how my baby is growing and how she is changing. Seems like now she can flip herself, from back to front. However, because her arms are still not strong enough, she cannot flip back... But according to my wife, it is like her favourite hobby now and she will flip and flip and flip... And once she flips, she will look proudly at mommy.... perhaps hoping for a praise. But of course poor mommy has to flip her back to her back and it gets tiring and irritating.

So as you can see my dear readers, finding something to make you happy is an important thing. For me, the simplest things will just set me off.... In a good way of course.

How come life is like that?

You know happy readers, as you may have gathered from my posts, I will not spoil my kid. She may be an angel, but still, in treating her like an angel, she may turn out to be the devil. So we promise, (wife and me) that we will not mistreat her, but will bring her up properly and not spoil her. We will not give her instant noodles just because it tastes nice and will not give her her own personal TV, laptop or other things. If she wants something, she will have to learn to earn it.

But then, in the recent news, a man killed his daughter because she screwed around with his cigs and he went crazy... I am sure my daughter will have icthy fingers and want to play with mine too. But I doubt if I will go crazy enough to kick and punch her... A bitch slap here and a kidney punch there... maybe... but not all that bad lah... Cigarrettes can always buy mah... children... expensive to remake hor.

It is like the mentality of people nowadays, or perhaps Sillyporeans I might say has really gone down the dumps. We get flustered easily, do not care about others and only worry about ourselves. Case in point, traffic. People cut in and out of lanes with no regard for others. Or they will do stupid things that will make the mother who made them very worried. And for what purpose? I have no idea. If they want to meet the maker in a fast and early way, let it not be by endangering others. Also, just getting themselves a bit inconvenienced will mean that they will cry foul till the end of days come. Hey... people... if you were to take responsiblity for your actions, think before you do something, it will lead to others doing the same thing. And then the whole world will be a better place. Seriously... it all starts with you.

Anyway, like I was mentioning about taking responsiblity, it is the same with almost everyone I know lah... Even Energizer was crying high and low that she is not spending any money and that we do not give her any money to spend. Yea.... does she even have any idea how much she spent while she was still mobile? While she was well, she got how much a month and how much did she save? How much money does she have left from the 120k? Even if she recieved only 90k! She still wants to play mahjong and so on... So where is the money coming from? What about her bloody medication? What about other things? She does not even know how hard it is to be earning money. And that is why.... every single day.... I feel so worried about how and where my family is going. Will the government help? We are the in-betweens, considered too rich and well to do to not need any help.

But hey... we are all gonna die in 2012 anyway, so who gives a heck... lets all spend as much as we can, enjoy as much as we can and not worry about any future. And if 2012 does not get us, I am sure that some other misadventure will get us and so we will still go and not need to worry about the future.... Right???? Bollocks to the people who think that way man... If you think about the now and the very near future, you are being short sighted or perhaps even blind. Though we do not know what tomorrow holds, good or bad, we must prepare for it.

Gotta go for now.... Byeeessss

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How we cannot live without our handphones

Hi readers!!! Just got back from Zurich... Man I am jet lagged, tired and have a cough and cold... Pity me... pity... pity pity...

While wallowing in self pity, actually I was pretty amazed that we are so dependant on modern technology and mainly our mobile phones. All our lives are in there, our contacts and so on... If we were to reach out and touch someone, we do it through our phones... And for me, I do not remember even my own wife's number... So if I lose my phone... I am so screwed... The one I was using, was actually on the fritz... It decided to die out on me.. So I was left wif no phone on the last day of my trip... Doooommmm on meeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!.... Actually my stupid sister even sms me to ask if I was ok... and she knew that my phone was gone....

I quickly went to the airport and bought a Nokia N97, which I am having a lot of grief using it now and called my wife. By that time, she was already panicking because she had not heard from me for almost a whole day. And in the end, I was thankful that all my contacts are kept in the sim card. She was already freaking out and I guess I understand because if you have a baby and your husband kicks it, imagine how you will feel.... heee heee..

But seriously though, life is such that no matter what, if it is time to go, it is time to go. Jus hope that all else remaining equal, when you go, there is not a whole lot of shit that someone else has to clean up.

My baby's gonna learn how to fly or swim

Hey sounds wierd doesn't it? Well the fact is, a monster typhoon is bearing down on the Japanese main island. According the the Met office... So a few ppl got concerned and asked if wifey and baby are ok... And that is what I said... baby will either learn how to fly or swim... Wat else can I say? No one in his or her right mind will go out in the rain and wind.... other than me lah... It was in the middle of a typhoon a long time ago, when I was still living in Japan. There was an idiot who went out in the storm, had his umbrella broken by the wind... jus to buy Hagen Daaz ice cream.... Hey... I can't help it... I love the ice cream... And even in the mid of winter when even my plumbing gets frozen, I would shiver under my blanket and eat the ice cream... But only Hagen Daaz hor...

Anyway, back to the typhoon... If wife and baby stay indoors, little should happen... other than maybe baby being afraid of the wind and the counds. Other than that, barring anything hurling through the windows, they should be safe. But if lucks is not with us and an earthquake hits while the typhoon is blowing, then we will have to go to plan B, which is for wife to go to a close by temple to take shelter. I would not want her to go to a place with tall buildings and temples do seem to be stronger and have more open places..

Life is like that lah... You cannot go against nature and should just take things as they come. I have already planned for all the contingencies and if anything happens, then we should take what action. That is the only thing we can do.

It is just like recently, I have been looking at my own mortality. I am willing and ready to go. I think I leave behind pleasant memories and good frens and that is most important. Wife and baby should be ok and she has the ability to create income on her own. It is not like I leave behind and idiot who can't earn and or learn.

And when I meet St Peter, I am happy and am not worried if I go up or down and or hang in limbo..

It is wierd, but I think I am not afraid of death or dying. I have seen it many times and have even come close to it a few times.. I think that the Grim Reaper has become and old fren... When he comes to get me, I will just say to him, "What took you so long... old fren?".. No... I am not being fatalistic.. I will not give up on life and have not given up. But it is true you know... I have come close a few times and walked away from it... And no... I do not think I am indestructable or immortal.

Let me count the number of times I almost had a date with Mr. Death....

1) When I was a child... You remember the old wooden cupboards? They were really solid and heavy huh? When I was 5 or 6, I was swinging on the doors like George of the Jungle... My silly sister joined me and then I got bored and was walking away when the cupboard came crashing down... S step later and the cupboard would have caved my brain in..I was actually luckier bcoz the blame fell on my sis... hehehehe

2) My army daze were also filled with adventure... Like one time... we were going back to camp after training in the steamy jungles... We were butt tired and dirty and I fell asleep in the land rover... And so did everyone else... including the driver... The truck in front stopped at a traffic light, but we did not... The next thing I remember was sitting by the side of the road, feeling my head and going.. "hmmmm ouch..... ooooohh blood!!??!!"

Well drama aside, ambulance came... I refused to sit down... was trying to get my head back in one piece and kept asking the medic... My name is such and such and my ic number is such and such right?? He got really pissed off with me because he was flapping big time and yet the patient was bugging him...

Well I had my come uppance many times over in a while... We got to the army hospital... the Head nurse was screaming that I was too dirty and my boots were too muddy and I had to ask my buddies to carry me to the toilet to wash my boots.. Then when the doctor saw me, he immediately sent me to Toa Payoh Hospital...

My second bad luck of the day was that when I reached the hospital... lo and behold was a guy who did not really like me and I did not particularly like him in Primary school....Hmmmm luck huh???

With head injuries... the patient could not take anything because of fear of the patient throwing up... but... I was out training and did not have anything to eat for 4 days... damn.... luck huh... Old Grim Reaper must have been having a chuckle....

3) In Thailand a few years ago, went scuba diving... I just love to swim around and watch the corals... not the girls ok?!! Dived into the pristine waters of Krabi and had a ball of a time... But big mistake was that I was doing it Australia style... Which meant jus the snorkel and mask... No life preserver... The waters off the Aussie coast can be pretty treacherous and also the waves and currents can be strong... But I would usually dive in calm waters and within markers so it was cool and great... Buuuuutttttt.... When I came up from the dive in Krabi... Oh my goodness (actually it was more like Holy Shit!!!)The stoopiiiddd boat was like over 50m away or even further and I was being pushed further and further... It took all my strength and I was already about to give up when I saw the safety diver and waved for help....

So as you can see, other than these episodes, there are heaps more and with my brain tumours and so on, I would say that I keep seeing old Grim Reaper... So when he does finally come to tap me on my shoulder and say that it is time.. I would most probably ask him why he took so long...

Updates and So on

Well, I have been travelling like a crazy dog (but luckily not crazy enough to bite anyone yet) for the past few weeks while still keeping sane for all the problems and troubles I have at home... It goes to show that we do not need anyone (and I mean any one hor) to get thru.

Last week, I got back and followed energizer rabbit and sis to see the Oncologist. Her looked at her and then the records and then recommended oral chemo only. It was a sigh of relief as this would not tax the old lady too much and also at the same time would leave us a bit more able to work and also be not so expensive. You know something? I may sound really harsh and they (mom and sis) do not understand why I am like that, but lets face it, when people are in lala land for whatever reason, someone has to stay grounded to be able to bring the whole caper through. If everyone goes to lala land, I can promise you that nothing will get done and more problems will crop up,

Why do I say that it is a good thing that mom is only getting oral? She is 71. If she gets the injectable, it will cause her to lose her hair, feel like dying and so on... For her, would she want that sort of life? She keeps saying she does not want to die, well babe... at 70... you are looking at the grim reaper smiling at you and he is saying "see you soon". How much more time will you have? 5yrs? 10? So every day and every moment is already something that you have won. (oh yea... that also does not mean u have to sell away the farm and all its lifestock just to enjoy)

Chemo is bad and she will be sick and tired and also be throwing up and so on. In the end, will she really enjoy the life she is having? It is like Hemodialysis. It will keep you alive, but for the cost and the pain? Is it worth it?

Let us not forget that mom does have dementia and is therefore not really able to understand that she wants and or how to get it or what she feels. Take a child... ask him or her what she wants and she will say "Ice cream" or something. But do they know why? Do they know if it is good for then or not? So I really do not get it when people say that the energizer rabbit is ok... She was showing signs of dementia before the cancer and she will still be demented even if she is cured.

It is sad and no one wants to see someone they love leave. Especially if it is a parent. But we have to be realistic and not to be too happy or ecstatic. My sis was jumping up and down like Tom Cruise when he was on the Oprah Show and I was just wondering... hmmm... there is still a tump in the liver and the cancer has spread to the lumph nodes... so nothing much to be happy about leh... And to top it all off... we must now start to think of contingencies and also other scenarios... If the lump in the liver grows and is cancerous how? Rabbit can die of a heart attack and other complications... Then how? All these things are still big problems we have to face either now or in the future.

And guess what... this is a good chance to say that what can we get from the gahmen about this? Haizzzzz.... my gentle reader... that is why I always say... do not depend on others...

Anyways... thats the round up of the top news for the week. My darling baby girl jus had her BCG and she was flapping big time the whole night through. I think she must have been pretty pissed off about the prick.. I will get to see her soon and will be with her from then on... I see it as the beginnging of a new journey and a new life... What do you think?